Monday, February 8, 2010

Babies don't keep

I am struck with gratitude this morning. I am tired, I am worn out, and I am grateful. I get to hold my sweet babies. I get to watch my babies grow. I get to see Lily ride her bike, and watch Samuel nurse and begin to smile.

Some other parents are right now letting go of their children, giving them up to heaven. They are holding their child's hand, whispering words, sitting silent. They are crying, weeping. They are praying. I cannot imagine.

So many times I get caught up in the stress of my day. I look past the sweet moments and see the piles of laundry. I miss the chance to hug, kiss, cuddle...because I am too busy. I am not in the moment as often as I should be. I am, instead, making lists in my head of what I should be doing.

Truth be told, what I should be doing is loving my babies. I should be taking every opportunity to kiss and cuddle and read books and play play-dough and talk and laugh. I should stop getting caught up in what is not getting done, and focus on what I CAN do, right now, in this moment.

I found a blog yesterday. It is heartbreaking and beautiful. It made me think. It made me cry. And most of all, it made me make the decision to be in the moment, right now, with my children.

Dust can wait. Laundry can pile up. E-mail can go unanswered. One day my children will not want to spend time with me. They will not want to be picked up or read to. They will want me to fade into the background.

So today, I will not rush. I will not spend each moment of a feeding with Samuel thinking about what I could be getting done. I will not rush through a book with Lily so I can return a phone call. I will love, and pay attention, and give, and let the mundane details of life wait.

Hug your babies today. Love them, and SEE them. Do it for those parents who cannot.

Fly high, sweet baby Layla.