Thursday, July 24, 2008

Lucky...

What is luck, really?

I've been having a round of posts with my girlfriends, and alot of them center on luck. "I'm lucky to have you." "I'm so lucky you are in my life."

I admit that I myself am the first one to say this. But I've been thinking alot about it today, and I want to stop using that particular term- lucky.

This word itself is used to express an beautiful idea, but one that is based on the notion that the things and people that come to you are happenstance, random, and not something you have created.

This idea bothers me, because there was no luck involved in my friendships. There was a divine hand, and also alot of acceptance on my part that I would have to put myself out there, no matter how uncomfortable it made me. I would have to open myself up and give of myself to have anyone give back to me. None of this has anything to do with luck.

Instead of saying "I am lucky to have you." I feel it is more appropriate to say "I am so glad we chose each other." or "I am so glad to have you in my life."

Although this change in speech is much clumsier, it conveys better what I am trying to say- not "I am glad the randomness of life dropped you in my lap." but "I choose you, just as you are, to be my friend. I choose to accept and love you, and I choose to open my arms to you because you are good and worthy of love."

Yeah, I know, I am overthinking things. But bear with me.

My friend Emily said something that struck me as really profound. She was telling another dear friend of mine that by her actions she attracted good people to her. That in just being herself, and in being positive and caring and loving, she attracted those things back to her. I like this idea much better. It's much more motivating to be a force of good energy on this earth, if you know you will get those good vibes and care back. As I've grown older, I have found this to be one of the truest things I have ever known.

What you put out comes back to you, over and again.

Today I am committing myself to more love, more care, more laughter, and more joy. I will heap my love and care on my friends, give my smile carelessly to strangers, love and squeeze my family, and forgive liberally.

I will say what I need to say. I will say I love you to those I love, without worry of sounding silly. I will say "I care." I will give and give and give again. I will offer myself, my thoughts, my words, my deeds in abundance, not because I feel lucky, but because I CHOOSE to.

I love you, and I choose you, my friends. Anything, anywhere, anytime, now and always.

(S-3)