Sunday, May 8, 2011

Mother's Day

Mother's Day.

I used to dread this day.

And then, like tide over sand, God washed the old away and made everything new.

Where there was sadness, there is now great joy.

Where there was loneliness, companionship.

Where there was anger, now there is contentment.

Where there was a holding on to hurt, there is a letting go.

And the letting go, is just bliss.

Today is about my babies.

Today is about family.

Today is about celebrating the women who have stepped INTO my life instead of stepping away.

And it is so beautiful.

I looked through Lily's newborn clothes today. All of the little, all of the pink, all of the memories flooded me with such joy.

And also the knowledge of just how far we have come, she and I.

From a tiny newborn fighting for strength to this sweet spitfire of a girl.

A girl with her own voice, and her own spirit.

And me. A mother of two on this earth, learning that motherhood is so much more than I ever thought it could be.

Infinitely harder.

Infinitely sweeter.

It has broken me, mended me, and broken me again.

It has opened my heart to such a degree that I cannot close it again. Not to my children, not to the world.

Made me softer to all things, more compassionate at all times.

Made me love deeper. Made me hurt worse than any other pain.

I believe in something bigger than myself- in family and love that can and will not be broken.

I believe in all of the true things, the lasting things, and the God given things.

I believe in my abilities as a mother and as a woman.

And I also believe and know that my children will never know what I did.

They will know love and devotion that does not waver. They will know loyalty that will not turn away, ever.

They will know love that does not ever give up. Ever.

Life is sweet. Life is good.

And God has made it all possible.

Happy Mother's day.