Thursday, January 1, 2009

Just a vent

I'm having one of those days today. You know when you feel just crummy about yourself? Not myself in general, but my appearance.

I gained 7 lbs. *sigh*

I feel such shame over this. I know it's my fault, and I can see it when I look in the mirror. It's all over my thighs and stomach. And I also know in the grand scheme of things, it's not such a big deal. But it makes me very very sad.

I really try hard. But when I give in and eat cookies and fudge and pie like everyone else this time of year, I gain 4 times as much as anyone else.

And yes, I am aware my last post was all about loving myself and etc. And I do. My body is strong. But it's also big, and doesn't reflect my lifestyle. I want to look the way I feel- strong. And I don't. And I never will.

I don't want this to come off as whiny, but I am feeling a bit sorry for myself. I know this 7 pounds will take upwards of 6 months to lose, even with great effort. Heck, I've been doing Stroller Strides since March and haven't lost a pound. I'm much stronger and way more fit, but any lighter- no.

So, just venting. I know you ladies will understand that.

Thanks for listening...